Vision Quest Read online

  Arik snorted. "You're not the only one who has thanks to say or regrets to forgive. We have time to do that later. Rest now."

  With a smile Blaze let his fingers fall on Arik's face. A soft buzz of connection lighted between both of them, and it made Arik's heart skip a beat. For all of about two seconds. Then everything inside of him seemed to fall with disappointment. He gripped Blaze's arm in a rush of panic. "It's still there. Fuck, Blaze, it's still there!"

  He sat up, dragging Blaze with him. "It's supposed to be gone! That's why you suffered! That's what all this was for! Why the fuck is it not gone?"

  "It's gone," Blaze said, quietly. He caught Arik's hand, pushed aside the robe, and rested it on his chest. Arik's eyes closed, memories of a heated night in a boring hotel bloomed in Arik's mind, and ended with the thought of a single charge being snapped between his fingertip and a door handle. Infused, he recalled his thought, by Blaze.

  Maybe a person never got rid of the charge of true love. Maybe real connection came with surprise wonders that the worldly mind didn't understand.

  "And maybe," Blaze murmured, "they left us a gift."

  Blaze

  "What do you mean?" Arik asked, but Blaze was lost in Arik's eyes. Distracted by the shade of Arik's skin. Entranced by Arik's bare chest and the dark curls around his navel that disappeared beneath the belt and slacks that he still wore.

  "Blaze?" Arik murmured, the initial panic gone, but the impatient curiosity apparent. Blaze shook his head, and he lifted Arik's hand from his chest to his face. Blaze nuzzled Arik's palm, kissed it, and he caught sight of the fire in the stone hearth across the room. Blaze watched the dancing flames, and an old, old ache welled up inside him. Arik caressed his cheek, the punct luminos tingling and arcing, and Arik inched closer to Blaze.

  "I feel as though I lived in a bubble," Blaze said softly, and Arik squeezed Blaze's knee with his other hand. "No," Blaze corrected with a small laugh, "I lived in liquid fire. Heat so hot it was molten. I retreated there, when the witch's blood infused me. When she cursed me, making herself immortal within me and ensuring I'd be rendered near dead with agony should I dare force her true death." Blaze shook his head. "My fire, the last of what was left of my family and our magic, it protected me; kept me safe within where no harm could reach the real me. And now the last of the witch's blood is truly gone, burned out from where it lurked so long in its last, cursed vessel. It's gone, and I am free and I ... am alive. And here. With you. And I feel ..."

  "You feel?" Arik whispered, and he bit his lip.

  Blaze looked at Arik, whose eyes widened at whatever they saw in Blaze's. "Aware," Blaze said. "Awake. As though from a long dream. I can remember every moment of every one of my too-long years. I can remember the way Doru smelled. All the faces and smiles and sadness in every man I helped. But I can also remember ..." Blaze brushed Arik's lower lip with his thumb. "The first time you kissed me."

  "I remember it, too," Arik said, quietly, as though afraid to disturb the peaceful spell that had overtaken the old room in the older house lit only with their own little fire.

  Blazed inclined his head in a single nod. "I know the precise moments my life changed. When I fell in love, when I fell to the curse, and when I first saw you in my dreams. And I was there for them all. I was ... That was me. But now ... It's as though I'm all of my former self. And for the first time, all of me is in this moment with all of you." Blaze traced the line of Arik's jaw, felt the rasp of stubble and the heat of skin, and a pink flush began to creep across Arik's nose. His chest rose and fell in a faster rhythm, and Arik's eyelashes fluttered when Arik dropped his gaze to stare at Blaze's mouth and then lifted it again to meet Blaze's eyes. "Dragul meu," Blaze said. "My beloved. My lover. My ... Arik." Blaze rolled the word off his tongue with his native syllabic emphasis, and Arik's breathing skipped. "Who saw me, understood what afflicted me and how, and then had the courage to ... save me."

  "It was mutual," Arik muttered. "The saving." He kissed Blaze, though briefly and chastely. The spark ignited with enough force to make them both gasp, and Blaze held Arik's face in his hands. "So the gift is that you remember it all?" Arik asked, and he made their foreheads meet. "Survived with sanity intact and you're both who you were and who you are, now?"

  "I think so. Which means that this ..." Blaze traced his fingertips across Arik's shoulder until the man shuddered. "Is still ours. Because once, it was mine and mine to share with those whom I love. The legacy of my family and of my people. And ..." Blaze swallowed and stared again at the fire across the room.

  Seconds passed, maybe minutes, and Arik scooted closer until one of his knees was bent and behind Blaze and the other leg rested across Blaze's lap. Arik kissed Blaze's shoulder, slowly and gently, and crept along a line to Blaze's neck. Arik may have had a thousand questions, but the man didn't ask a single one. Blaze was grateful. There would be time to tell Arik everything—the good, bad, ugly, and beautiful—and Blaze would. Blaze wanted to. He couldn't remember feeling so alive and whole, and he wanted to share everything and every second he had left with Arik.

  And he wanted ... he needed ... he had to know ...

  "Arik?"

  "Mm?"

  "I think ... I need to show you something." Blaze swallowed, fear rumbling low in his body. Real fear that he'd not experienced in possibly centuries.

  "What is it?" Arik asked.

  "I ... I have to try something."

  "Blaze, what's ... you're shaking."

  "I know. I'm scared."

  Arik enveloped Blaze in an embrace that tugged a soft moan from Blaze. "What are you afraid of, baby?" he murmured.

  Blaze grinned and turned his head to kiss Arik. "I like you calling me that."

  Amused affection flickered across Arik's features. "Okay. Baby."

  Blaze chuckled and pulled away. He got up, stripped off the robe, and tossed it onto a chair. He circled to the foot of the bed, and Arik crawled to the end of it, watching intently. Blaze paused and faced the fireplace, and for a horrible moment, he couldn't remember how the magic worked. What had once been as natural as breathing was now lost to him, and in that instant, he mourned enough for three hundred years. The weight of loneliness that he'd felt without his God-given gift bore down upon his shoulders, and Blaze sucked a sob.

  "Blaze?" Arik asked, worried.

  Blaze waved a hand to show he was okay. He took a watery breath, letting the tears flow. At one time, such things were offerings and parts of spells. Maybe, here and now in this age of Internet and space travel and marvels, they could work the same way as they had in the time of wagons, simplicity, and magic.

  And he knew, too, that if this didn't work, it'd be more than okay. Blaze was a free man, and he had Arik. The miracle of figuring out the curse and it being broken paled in comparison to Blaze having a man to love who loved him. Next to that, any loss suffered was minor. If Blaze couldn't speak to or wield his Fire, he would nonetheless be a man gifted with a partner with whom he could grow, share, live, and die. Maybe the time he had left to walk the earth would be enough to convey to Arik what that meant; how impossible such an existence had once seemed, and how it made the entire universe balance to be given the chance to have it.

  Tears of grief slowly changed to tears of gratitude. Blaze knelt. He bowed his head. Please, he entreated to anything on the side of good that might be listening. Please grant unto me one last kindness. Allow me to have, hold, and use the gifts that were once bestowed upon many and that were stolen away into darkness. I am but one man with one pair of hands and one soul, but give me your grace, and I will touch as many as I can with the light. And I will start with the man who saved me.

  There was nothing but silence punctuated by Arik's breathing, and Blaze slumped, opening his eyes. The fire crackled, popped, and flung a tiny ember onto the rug near Blaze's knee. Without thinking, Blaze picked it up. The glowing mote sat cradled in Blaze's palm, and it winked as though it giggled.

  And then Blaze was no l
onger in the goat man's bedroom.

  He was in a million homes in a million fires over a million years.

  "Every fire that was still is," said Blaze's grandmamere, the voice fluttering the very fabric of the universe. "And every coal that burned is part of what you hold, and every ember that you touch knows its past and its present and something of its future."

  Blaze was warm, so warm ... and connected ... and ... giddy. One with the fire, which was hungry. Eating. Consuming. Eager. Blaze was lit from within and burning hotter the closer he was to the ground. He could touch the night; be with the treetops and the wind and be part of the stars. And every heart he warmed, every soul who came near him, he could glimpse. He could know them, if only for an instant.

  And Fire ... in turn ...

  "Knows me," Blaze whispered, and somehow he had moved from the rug to the flagstones in front of the cheerful baby blaze. And Arik—

  Oh, LIKE him! Like him ... save him ... warm him ... like him! Keep him warm! Old man, he'll be. Live long. Happy. See? See?

  — was there, speaking urgently in warning, but Blaze reached into the dancing red-gold-orange, cupped his palm as though gathering water, and brought out a bit of Fire who wanted to play.

  "Holy shit," Arik muttered, and together they stared at Blaze holding naked fire flickering in his hand.

  "It likes you," Blaze said, cheeks sore from smiling.

  "It ... what?"

  Fire whispered, babbling a mile a minute, so happy to find someone who could hear. "And it missed me," Blaze said. "And says we'll be old men together, someday, holding hands on—"

  Big wet ick thing. Next to. Ew. Ew.

  "—the beach." Blaze laughed. "This one's very young."

  Arik looked from the fire to Blaze and back again. "I really, really want to understand, here, Blaze."

  Drawing away from the elemental awareness in his grasp, Blaze focused on Arik. He oriented himself to the present with skill that he'd not, in fact, forgotten, and he took three deep breaths. "Fire is alive, but not like you and me. Or maybe it is, and it's closer to our understanding of an Oversoul or even a god. It's connected to every time it's ever been lit. And some Fire is connected to what will be. And it ... talks to me. Shows me things. It's sort of words, it's sort of pictures, but it's ..." Blaze swallowed and realized he couldn't continue because he was weeping.

  Arik put an arm around Blaze's waist. "This is what the witch took from you?"

  "It's what was buried beneath her blood inside me."

  "Because if she hadn't ..."

  Blaze nodded. "It's why she destroyed my family, like I said. We would have seen her. And when she chose to let me live, she had to stop the same sight and power."

  "So ... this is what you used to do?"

  Blaze nodded, and when the little guy in his hands got too demanding, he lifted it to his face. Arik grunted, clearly unsure about this, but Blaze calmly let the fire kiss away the tears. They vanished in tiny puffs of steam.

  "So you listen to it? Hear the future?" Arik asked.

  "Sometimes. Usually, we ask it to cleanse. Or, well. We did."

  "Cleanse?"

  "Disease. Sadness." Blaze paused. "Evil."

  "You can ... heal with it?"

  "I could. I can." Blaze sighed, remembering his prayer and his promise. "I think I will again. But it also ..."

  An avalanche of memory thundered through Blaze. Doru, beneath him. Doru, above him. Doru laughing. Crying. Calling to heaven in pleasure. The fire in Blaze's hands got the idea and flickered brighter.

  Yes! Yes-yes. Oh yes. Can we?

  The fire painted a hundred pictures for Blaze in a heartbeat, and Blaze shivered, cock filling. He scooped out more fire, had a fast discussion about what it couldn't do or burn or hurt, and Blaze put the fireball on the floor.

  "Are you sure that's a good—" Arik began, but didn't get to finish. Blaze pulled Arik to him while around them, the fire formed a ring.

  "Yes, dragul meu, I am very sure."

  The kiss was similar to the hundreds that had come before it, but different, too. Because when Arik's lips pressed to his, Blaze felt the pressure and the spark with every inch of his restored being. And when Arik's mouth opened and tongue slid against his, Blaze moaned for the sheer slip-slick-touch sensation of it. The safe place he'd stayed within his own body had been protection but also a dampener; a cell. Unleashed from his prison, everything was richer and more vibrant, and when Arik pulled away to cry out a broken groan, Blaze suspected he wasn't the only one who felt the difference, the closeness, the intensity.

  "The. .. oh God, the ..." Arik panted, and Blaze kissed Arik's throat, collarbone, and chest. He sucked a nipple between his teeth, and Arik arched. Arik's fingers dug into Blaze's hair, and Blaze hastily undid Arik's belt and fly, dying for full-body contact. The fire skipped backward when Arik had to lie down to yank off his pants and socks, and the curtain of flame parted when Blaze tossed the clothing beyond the ring.

  "Is that going to ... set off smoke alarms or ..." Arik gulped.

  Blaze chuckled throatily, wrapping himself around Arik. "No," he said, burying his face against Arik's neck and suckling at the skin. Arik caressed Blaze's back, ass, and thigh, and Blaze shoved against the floor, rolling. Blaze hovered over Arik and grinned. "Trust me?"

  "Entirely," Arik said, so seriously that Blaze kissed his nose to make him laugh.

  "Good." Blaze beckoned to the fire, more to warn Arik than out of communicative necessity, and the ring crept across the floor. He scooped a handful of flame, murmured his intentions, and slowly lowered his hand toward Arik. Breathing faster, Arik watched the descent, and his grip on Blaze's hip tightened. Blaze tipped his hand, carefully spilling the fire so it brushed Arik, and when it did, Arik gasped.

  "Holy—!"

  "I know."

  Arik's eyes were wide open. His lips parted in a silent, Oh. And it took a second, but the concentrated punct luminos traveled through the flame and into Blaze's hand. It tingled like his hand was the embodiment of pleasure on the cusp of release. Blaze gritted his teeth and slid the fire down the center of Arik's chest and stomach.

  "Oh my God ... oh my ... fucking ..." Arik's lower body lifted off the floor in a controlled thrash. "God! How ... why?"

  "I don't know," Blaze said. He had mercy and took the fire away, though it complained about it. Arik blinked up at Blaze, dazed. "Going theory is that since my magic is fire-based, and it is the magic that makes the spark between myself and others, that adding the raw element to the mix intensifies it tenfold."

  "Tenfold?" Arik wheezed. "Try a hundred. Fold. God."

  "So you like it?" Blaze asked.

  "Yeah."

  "Want more?"

  Arik's eyelids lowered to half-mast. "... yeah."

  "Good." Blaze popped the fire into his mouth, shifted so he was between Arik's legs, and planted a Fire-fueled kiss to Arik's hipbone. Arik wrapped his arms around Blaze's head, breath held and body taut. After a few seconds, he grew accustomed to the heat-tingle in the kiss, loosening his grip, and Blaze licked a line to the base of Arik's cock.

  "Oh God ... oh fuck ... oh God," Arik mumbled. Blaze nosed the thick curls in warning, and he rolled his eyes to watch Arik's face as he began to mouth Arik's shaft. Arik's head tipped side to side, and he got a death grip in Blaze's hair and on Blaze's shoulder. Around them, the fire snuck closer, wanting nothing more than to keep this man warm and safe and happy. Blaze shuddered with dual consciousness, and, when he took the head of Arik's dick into his mouth, he went slow and gentle. The sizzle-burn would do the work, and it took some getting used to, if Blaze remembered right.

  Above Blaze, Arik whimpered and trapped the sounds behind pressed lips. His skin was feverish to the touch, sweaty beneath Blaze's palms, and Blaze so-so-carefully swallowed Arik's length and rose so-so-slowly back up. Arik's foot planted itself on the floor with a slam. His heel dug into the rug. His pelvis rocked toward Blaze, but after the third trip down, Arik wrenc
hed Blaze off of him. Arik pulled Blaze up until they were nose to nose, and Blaze saw the split second of fearless decisiveness that allowed Arik to kiss Blaze with a mouthful of fire.

  "God," Arik whispered.

  "Arik ..."

  "So ..."

  "Good. Oh."

  They held one another, touching, gripping, kissing, finding friction anywhere they could. Blaze blew the fire off his tongue, and Arik relaxed beneath and against him when their lips met again. Soon the body tease was too much for either to take, and at the same time, they made room, each grasping the other's cock and stroking it. They swallowed and tasted each other's moans, sucked on lips, nibbled on ears, and Blaze willed himself to occupy the same space as Arik; to be the same.

  Arik rolled them. Blaze braced an arm across Arik's shoulders, and he pushed the fingers of his spare hand between Arik's ass cheeks. Arik sucked a gasp against the shell of Blaze's ear. "Fire," Arik said, aroused and urgent and hushed. "Use it there, Blaze, please ... use it ..."

  Blaze found Arik's mouth. He kissed Arik senseless, urging Arik to keep rolling against him. He knew the fire had found his hand when the warmth and spark ignited his skin, and he nudged Arik's asshole with a flaming touch.

  "Shit!" Arik sank his teeth into Blaze's ear, moaning. Blaze lifted his hand to his mouth, coated his fingers with spit, and returned fingers and fire to flexing hole. He pushed inside, and Arik cried out, full-throated. Arik's body sucked Blaze deeper, and Arik, as though reading Blaze's wishes, propped himself up and above Blaze. Arik locked his elbows, and Blaze used one hand to fuck Arik and the other to stroke him. Arik's eyes rolled beneath their lids, and groans spilled on every one of his breathy exhales.

  "Frumuseţ," Blaze said in awe of the gorgeous sight of Arik lost and wanting.

  "Te ..." Arik swallowed and got his eyes open and down on Blaze. "Te iubesc."